Kisscafe

It's no secret that online dating personals sites are a virtual gold mine spewing forth mountains of wealth for those who cultivate it. Think about it: personals Web sites only provide a simple service for a fee. Their overhead is you and I. Without us and other single people, they have no Web site. So, as a single person, how much is the sole service of hooking you up with other singletons worth?

All dating sites allow you to post a profile free of charge (I can safely say that as I've NEVER seen a site that charges you a fee just to set up a stinkin' profile). Free is good. Back in the day, sites made you pay to "throw out the first pitch" to anyone you thought to be interesting. Back in the day, you could reply to e-mails without having to be a paying subscriber. Yes, back in the day, it was a one-sided system that opened the gate to many a romantic interlude. It favored shy, uncommitted women and left men in control of that first pitch yet $20 poorer. Oh, how I long for the days of yore!

Then, on a dark and dismal day, the first of the personals titans, Match.com, made the switch requiring any and all members to have a paid subscription in order to send or reply to an e-mail. I'm all about the pursuit of the American dollar but this really chapped my hide. Previously, I could at least be assured that if I sent out an e-mail, I knew that the object of my attention could reply at their leisure. If they didn't, it probably meant that they weren't interested. Simple. Cut and dry. No need to argue. NEXT!

I even resorted to devising a system to get around the "double subscription system": include my e-mail address in my initial e-mail. But this seemed desperate and, in some instances, unsafe. It eliminates your privacy if the guy turns out to be a psycho and makes you look hard-up at best. There's no room for innocent, unassuming, covert flirting. You either have to give up the goods right away or you don't get anything in return (unless your match also has a subscription).

You know that saying "If you don't like something, go someplace else"? I took that very saying to heart and moved my single butt on over to Yahoo! Personals where they were still utilizing the old way of doing things. All was well until they too just recently adopted the "double subscription system." I was miffed. I even spouted off an e-mail to them asking why they did this, asked for statistics on how many users dropped off the site in favor of cheaper alternatives. Not surprisingly, I never got a reply. I couldn't even find a press release on the event! Sneaky bastards.

To allay the masses, both Match.com and Yahoo! Personals let you "wink" at other members or you can choose from a pre-determined list of "quick replies." But don't get your hopes up. You're allowed to do this only once to a potential match but after that, any other correspondence requires a credit card. Jerks.

Now, just because I don't like this new way of doing things doesn't mean I'm content with just sitting here complaining about it. I always thought that it does no one any good if you bitch about something without offering a solution to make things better.

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